Demogogue
Here’s lookin’ to you, kid.
Citizen
Shut up — you had me at “hello.”
You have bewitched me, body and soul.
I like you very much. Just as you are.
Demogogue
So you’re telling me there’s a chance?
Citizen
Inconceivable!
What we’ve got here is failure to communicate.
We all go a little mad sometimes.
Demogogue
You talkin’ to me?
Citizen
That’s a fact, Jack!
Demogogue
I AM OZ…. the Great and Powerful!
I’m the king of the world!
King Kong ain’t got shit on me!
The stuff that dreams are made of.
Demogogue
Yeah, well, that’s just, like, your opinion, man.
Surely you can’t be serious.
Demogogue
I am serious…and don’t call me Shirley.
You can’t handle the truth!
Do you understand the words that are coming out of my mouth?
Citizen
ET phone home.
Stupid is as stupid does.
Do or do not. There is no try.
Demogogue
English, motherfucker! Do you speak it?
It’s a madhouse! A madhouse!
Citizen
Houston, we have a problem.
I’ve got a feeling we’re not in Kansas anymore.
Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain.
Demogogue
You’re out of order!
Nobody puts Baby in a corner.
I have become more powerful than any Jedi.
Citizen
You are no Vader. You are just a child in a mask.
You better lawyer up, asshole.
Go ahead, make my day.
Demogogue
I was perfect.
I coulda been a contender.
Citizen
Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn.
Welcome to Earth.
Demogogue
Look what you’ve done! I’m melting! Melting!
The horror. The horror.
Citizen
Elementary, my dear Watson!
Hasta la vista, baby!
Demogogue
I’m finished.
Citizen
Yippee-ki-yay, Mother F***ker.
And may the Force of Justice, Equality, and Freedom be with us all!
© 2026, Kenneth Koziol. All rights reserved.